Few things in life happen by accident.
And most of the great experiences are the by-product of years–if not a lifetime–of thought, hope and love.
2013 was one such experience. Temporal, timeless and a bucketful of clichés.
Thinking back, I lived the year by Maya Angelou’s words. Clichéd? Maybe.
“I've learned that making a "living" is not the same thing as making a "life." I've learned that life sometimes gives you a second chance. I've learned that you shouldn't go through life with a catcher's mitt on both hands; you need to be able to throw something back. I've learned that whenever I decide something with an open heart, I usually make the right decision. I've learned that even when I have pains, I don't have to be one. I've learned that every day you should reach out and touch someone. People love a warm hug, or just a friendly pat on the back. I've learned that I still have a lot to learn. I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel”
People, all kinds of them walked into my life this year. People from whom I learnt how to, people from whom I learnt how not to, people who inspired, people who hurt, people who taught me to laugh, people who pushed me towards something, people who pushed me away, people who taught me to be courageous, people whom I fell in love with, people who fell in love with me. That’s when I realized that there was this picture of me in their heads, a picture of someone I don't know yet. She is not the chubby girl with bad hair. She is someone new, a blank slate they have named beautiful. That is what I am now: beautiful. Beautiful, with this erasing of history.
This year I learnt that, loss is inevitable. When you lose something, it breaks your soul. You live with memories of “could-have-beens” and “what-ifs”. Unnecessary questions plague your mind. Every tiny situation finds its way back to the root. Hurt. Guilt. And an unexplainable feeling of emptiness.
I also learnt that there will be a better tomorrow, something beautiful will come along, a time will come when the memories seem faint, the sun seems brighter and the love seems warmer.
This year, I understood myself, every nook and cranny, in every black hole and bright spot -
“Kavya Gowda is crazy. She doesn't know how to behave with all the apples and oranges. She doesn't suffer from her eight million short-comings, she loves them! Kavya loves dogs, food, people, words, being barefoot, Dr. Seuss, colors and has far too many books for her own good. She is strong and kind, loving and ruthless, sensible and free spirited, seriously fun and “the-best-conversation-you’ll-ever-have”. When she's not speaking, you can find her baking, running after her dog, playing with kids, devouring a book, planting crazy ideas in someone's head, changing the world and cleaning her room. Kavya is not a Toastmaster to earn a living, she is one - to live. She is a Marketing professional, crazy dancer and a compassionate friend to all. This year Kavya aspires to finally give up on eating too much and will instead spend that time putting a little bit more of her heart on the page."